Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain etc.

Since I keep an ongoing sinus infection, I call my Dr at the little On Call place (which provides better service than the big name brand doctors do, but that's another story) and had him call in a script for me. I called Rite-Aide (which I changed to hoping for more mature personal than CVS, but that's another story too) and of course I get Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain. All pharmacy techs have one of those names that tells you right off that their IQ is a lower number than their bust size. Their mama's named them while dreaming of homecoming queens.
"Heeelloo can I help you?" She chirps in that voice that makes 13 year old boys pop a woody. I identify myself and ask if the Dr has called in a script, what the med is and how much it will be.
"Hold onnnn!" SO I wait. "Ohhhhh, that will be 57 and 57", she says all pleased with herself.
I say. "Hold it a minute Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain. It's not that much with Medi-Care and I have met my deductible. You better re-lick that calf." There is a pause.
"Oh! Let me check. H-H-Hold on."
So I wait, listening to a lot of shuffling sounds which leads me to believe that Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain has stuffed the phone into her bra.
"I found it and it looks like your are going to have to bring your insurance card in. We don't have you on record," she say in a sing-song voice sure to calm those crabby seniors. She has adopted her professional voice now that she knows that she is dealing with a senile senior citizen.
"Well, poopsie," I say, "You better check yet again. I have my information on file. I know this because I buy six prescriptions and two types of insulin there every month. And until I got you on the phone there hasn't been any problem. So Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain, take your cutie little ass back to the computer and check it again."
"Hold on-n-n," she says and she sounds like she's gonna cry and have her big boyfriend in his letter jacket come and beat me up. So I wait. Lots more shuffling sounds, and a slightly hysterical muffled voice in the background. And I wait.
"Ohhh! Kay! I found it and there is not charge!" she chirps happily.
"Thanks, Tiffany/Brittany/Adrain," I say, "Now you put that bag of meds somewhere safe until I get there and get it, OK?" I can just see her smiling, her world back in place.
"Ohhhkay! " she giggles, "I will."
And people wonder why old folks just want to pick up the meds, go home, watch a little TV, take a small white pill and slip into a few hours of sleep apnea.